IN MY MIND – IN MY HEART

[Photo Source: Google online images]

(Jan 2012 – Even happy choices have their sacrifices.  There is a place where Dreams and Reality touch and become as one – a place of complete happiness, a place of harmony in one's Life and aspirations, the heaven of Home and Hearth, contentment of domestic Family living, passion, and Love of a spouse, a well of contentment and feeling safe and secure in the bosom of a Family.  Where is there a place where Dreams and Reality touch – with A Family of my own to cherish and to Love and be Loved by?  Only in my Mind  -–  Only in my Heart.  dht)

How easy it is to let my Mind slip into a fictional Life – where there is a Loving Spouse, Children, and Family -- such are my Day Dreams and Wishful thinking.

Just a Place in my Heart where one can go for a Time – but not for long for the Pain is too intense on the return to reality – my reality!

Love is a rare and precious thing.  Not everyone gets a chance at Love.  Those few that do, have no guarantee it will be lasting.  For some Love will have to wait another day for another reality!

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr – 2012]

[Photo Source: Google online images]

Whispered Secrets in a Fog

                             [Photo Credit: Google online images]
  

(30 NOV 2011 – Some words cast new shading on everything one thinks about themselves – now, yesterday, and tomorrow.  How sharp the contrast between my Heart's Abode – now worn and faded with Time's despair – and the images that flash across a reluctant mind, as dazzling and fresh as ever.  Some memories burn too hot to ever fade in the early morning fog.  dht)

 

The softest of breezes ruffles the morning's gray Fog –

Where whispered Secrets are spoken in hushed tones –

Where wisps of a new day play in the early mist.

Astonishing how a few short fierce words can pierce the gray of the world with a single beam of insight.

Then the Sun marches forth to reveal the Mysteries of a brilliant sky –

Then the Whippets of gray disperse in the sunny warmth of a new day.

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr – 2011]

Winter's Calling – Lost Love

                    [Photo Source: Google online images]

(29 NOV 2011 – Love's bloom died on the branch – never to easily recover from Loss, Pain, and Betrayal.  When does the Pain fade – dull its sharp focus.  The price is too high.  I simply cannot see beyond the gaping maw of my fate before me, though another may.  Some say despair is paramount when one is no longer able to sustain, even for the briefest moment, the notion that all will be well in the end.  Perhaps if they understood how many pieces my heart had broken into, they would then suffer me.  dht)

Slowly – piece-by-piece – is the process of withdrawal unto self, the Spirit withering just as leaves on the tree wither in Winter's calling.

The enfolding warmth of a bright sunny day – loving spouse and Family – fall by the wayside of a troubled Path.

Reality's illusions of Familial Love -- drop away as falling leaves absent the limbs of trees.

Whispers of Lost Love rustle in the breeze, as favorite memories of days gone by -- drop away as dead leaves from barren branches.

As Times passes through Nature's Seasons, the past becomes muted as if the Years belonged to someone else – apart – just as the leaves on the ground seem to have forgotten from whence they sprang.

All Hope of a change of Season – of Heart – with renewed sprouts forthcoming of a Litany of Longing and Affection – died as the fallen leaves from barren branches.

As the last rays of Winter's light withdraws from a frozen Landscape – a cold Heart – the Season falls into Morpheus's embrace with silent tears.

Love's Mystery withered and died – when it should have grown – pushed to the deepest corner of the Heart – where no light shines and only shadows of memories linger.

A new Spring follows the Winter's solstice for some -- for others the Change of Season cannot be weathered and can no longer "move on" with Life's Journey.

Life's Journey is a lesson of survival without Love, without sunshine, without warmth -- bereft of Hope, of Happiness, Youth, Dreams --

Forever Lost – Forever! 

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr - 2011]

RIP – Be Still

[Photo Source: Google online images]

(28 NOV 2011 – My weary Heart beats discordant with Time – for my Heart lies in the Past with my Memories.  Life goes on all around me as Nature takes its turn in Time with the changing of Life's seasons.  My steps are disharmonious with Nature's Time - My Heart is tired of the Loss.)  [dht-2011] 

BE STILL my weary Heart.

Listen to Nature's Heartbeat. –

In accord with the changes of Nature's Seasons.

Rest here in Nature's bosom –

In accord with the changes of My Seasons.

As one with Nature's Hourglass –

In accord with the changes of Life's Seasons.

Rest In Peace my weary Heart –

BE STILL.

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr – 2011]

                   [Photo Source: Google online images]

FROM HERE TO TOMORROW

[Photo Source: Google online images]

 

(22 NOV 2011 -  The Holidays and special remembered occasions bring their own weighted burden to one's Heart – a Birthday, a Wedding, an Anniversary, a Death, a Divorce, a Thanksgiving, a Christmas, a Valentine, a ...   At such Times, all of one's resources are needed, and lots of tissues, to pass through those potent memories so laden with Love and Pain. dht )

All too often, my thoughts turn backwards in Time – to where the memories assail.

Every time I come to a turn in the Pathways in my Life or a Time when the daily routine leaves my mind free to wander – my thoughts drift over the Past like a frequent visitor. 

I wonder anew where my Life's Journey would have taken me if I had made different choices.

Where is the Path to Peace and Happiness?  It surely cannot lie in Tomorrow, although it had its roots in Yesterday – that Path is overgrown now with the weeds of despair, pain, regrets, grief, and tears.

Surviving a prolonged state of depression causes one to shift their thinking and straddle emotional distress.

The weight of my past, my memories – is an overwhelming burden that buries my feelings in despair, pain, regrets, grief, and tears.

There is nothing like the holidays to bring back old memories of days gone by, lost loves, families estranged, loneliness, and the bittersweet memories of former Times – all past now leaving an emptiness in the Path.

The Last Chapter –
the last part of my Life's Journey.

HOW will it be written?  With despair, pain, regrets, grief, and tears, with an unending –
never-ending sameness –

From Here-To-Tomorrow?

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr - 2011]

A QUIET JOY – A TIME FORGOTTEN

(Photo Source: Google online images]

(5 NOV 2011 – There is in Nature a healing balm – available to all freely and in abundance.  When the tide of melancholia threatens to drown me, I go outside and tend to my garden, walk under the stars, or watch the clouds roll by.  It is only outside that, a certain welcome calm flows over me in a veil that shields me from transient thoughts of gloom.  dht)

As I let my head lay against a woodsy Oak –

my eyes scanned the azure Sky –

and I watched the clouds move across

a bright blue Sky.

For a moment, I forgot,

at least for the time being,

what it meant to be unhappy,

or lonesome, or depressed.

A Quiet Joy –

filled my senses –

A Joy that outlasts –

Transient sorrows.

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr – 2011]

NATURE'S SECRETS

                  [Photo Source: Online images National Geographic]

(3 Mar 2011 -- Twice BLESSED are ye who see the heart where time and 'stance masks!  dht)

WHAT sweet poetry of NATURE'S anthem

resides in this inhospitable shell

WHAT mental stream of consciousness

keynotes a monologue of regret

WHAT creature exists on Earth's plane

at the changing mercy of NATURE'S whimsy

WHAT awaits the searcher

at the gong of life's end clock

WHAT unanswered calls of yesterday

go unsaid today and forgotten tomorrow

WHAT new dawn foretells

of fortunes lost on yesterday dreams

WHAT spent passion wounds

there cauterized by heartache

WHAT layers yet to unfold

reveal repeating patterns of yesterday shadows

WHAT sweet NATURE does restore

the balance and chase away demons

WHAT instrument NATURE's brandish

doth level the sharpness of lingering regret

WHAT rich nectar of NATURE does sustain

through moments of despair with assurance all's well

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr]

 

***************

In this offering: What do you notice about the words? Their meaning? Sentence structure? Pairing of Sentences? First word, middle, or last words of Sentences? What words could be substituted? What connection words added for clarity? What meaning of your own would you assign to these words, phrases, sentences?

 

--------------- OR, Why didn't you just say so! ---------------

WHAT patterns do you see in this PIX?

WHAT mysteries of NATURE come to mind?

WHAT phantoms, demons, shadows await the explorer?

WHAT season is this?

WHAT time of day's cycle?

WHAT abode? Permanent? Temporal?

WHAT are you? Participant? Observer? Advisor? Companion? Uninvolved? Disinterested?

Don't give a 'hoot' or 'whistle'?

JUST an interesting PIX and some jumble of syllables?

---------------

DAY's VENUE

 [PHOTO SOURCE: National Geographic online images]

 

(20 Feb 2011, Sunday --  Just a few words to go with this PIX.  It is astonishing how a few short phrases pierce the gray of your world with a single beam of light. dht)

***************

WHERE goes the day

Down yester night's passage.

How blind today's privilege

Lost fast in yesterday's grasp.

Tomorrow's dream a pledge

Whence nature's precedence assures.

Breast expanse upon deep breath

While shallow essence sums life's interval.

What key holds true for grantor's trust

Whilst surety and worth stand anon.

Time bespoke metered sameness

Whose vowel foretold spoiled fortune.

Ribbons linger as fragments

Where once whole, a heart full.

Shattered spectrum of hopes

Cast away on ocean's tears.

Love's gamble played and lost

Age of regret the debt.

Once concealed by life's chains

Now released by nature's bail.

What hostage behind the threshold

Where compromise affords release.

What sound the closing door

What venue the open window.

What knock insures a beggars entrance

What token barters the price.

[Dorothy Hazel Tarr]

***************

In this offering:

What do you notice about the words?  Their meaning?  Punctuation?  Sentence structure?  Pairing of Sentences?  First word, middle, or last words of Sentences?  What words could be substituted?  What connection words added for clarity?  What meaning of your own would you assign to these words, phrases, sentences?

--------------- OR, Why didn't you just say so! ---------------

 

Today is just a memory that has passed into yesterday.

Thoughts of yesterday blind you to the beauty of today.

Tomorrow is a new beginning as sure as the sun will rise.

Now the lungs expands, as if you had been living with too little air for a long time, where before your breaths were shallow and the pain too great for deep breathing.

What is the secret to giving your trust to another, while other(s) do nothing to earn and secure your trust?

The rest of your life will be nothing but more of the same ... misfortune.

The ones you LOVED the most in this world, have all cut away a piece of your heart, until all is left are tattered ribbons of melancholy and despair.

A bright future so full of a kaleidoscope of hopes lays shattered, lost and washed away with oceans of tears.

It may be better for some to LOVE and LOSE, than never to LOVE at all; but what price must be paid and for what duration.

The years of aching emptiness and pain are camouflaged in life's daily routine, but soon there will be an end to the pain as nature ends its hold to death's surrender.

Where are the words of forgiveness and compromise that release pain's grip on a broken heart?

The silence of the closing door confuses the opening of a window; as the lack of plain speaking confuses the path to understanding.

What will it cost the one who knocks; and what more must the one who knocks surrender?

 [Dorothy Hazel Tarr] 

***************

 

WINDOW DREAMs

How sharp the contrast between

the heart's abode now worn with time's despair

and the gaping mawe of fate with

its distant vistas casting new shades of meaning

on another world (another life, another time, another place)

filled with vibrant colors, sweet breaths, soft gentle breezes,

and LOVE's warm embrace.

 [Dorothy Hazel Tarr]